Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Hope Springs Eternal

Sorry I've been MIA for a little while. I was immersed in Harry Potter. Then, is was full-body tackled by work. I have a small breather (a couple days) and then I probably won't be able to un-burry myself from work until the end of August. =(

Anyway, I just wanted to post a little update on how I'm doing. I'm CD3. Amazingly, I'm doing pretty well. I pretty much figured last cycle wouldn't be "the one" because our timing wasn't very good. I had a few moments of doubt because my luteal phase went 1 day longer than it has been for the past 4 cycles (the only cycles in the last few years that could be called "regular") so I wondered. But, then AF came at 14dpo. That was actually exciting in itself because I have historically had a very short luteal phase. I am taking progesterone in the second half of my cycle to try to help with this problem. I don't want to manage to fertilize an eggie, only to have it flushed away before it can implant! (Of course, we have no way of knowing how many times this may have already happened, but I'm going to pretend it never has... It's too depressing to think otherwise.)

I think my endo may have improved some, which I'm very excited about! I did have some cramps this cycle during AF, but not nearly as bad as before and not at all during ovulation time. Also I did not have any break-through bleading this cycle which makes my think that I haven't developed any new polyps since my lap (at least not in my uterus). AND [TMI warning] I had A LOT of brown bleading and gummy mucus on the first day of AF. I hope that means that the acupuncture worked and that the stagnant blood was working its way out. If not, I'm kind of up a creek because we ran out of money and I had to stop going to acupuncture. I think I'll be ok though because on my initial visit my acu doc said I needed to go 10 times and I went 12 times total.

So, I'm pretty focused on this cycle now. We are planning the biggest boogie marathon of our lives. I don't think we will have anything get in the way (like trips, or tests to study for, etc.). That is exciting. It's hard to have good timing when life keeps getting in the way... I also have a good supply of pre-seed and 5 opks. This is my first time trying opks, so hopefully I can find my surge without having to buy more opks. I have a feeling that I ovulate around cd 15 so it will be good to know for sure. Also, I'm hoping that the opks will let me know if I have a "strong" or a "weak" ovulation. I guess we'll see... I used to use the spit ferning microscope, but my scope broke. I had trouble reading it anyway, so hopefully opks are more clear.

I guess the overall theme of this post is that I'm feeling hopeful. I'm feeling hopeful for the first time in at least 6 months. Sure, there were moments where I would try to grasp at hope and hold on, but it would always slip between my fingers (when I didn't just let go entirely). I actually feel like it is really possible for this month to be our month. So many people around me (in IF world and in RL world) have been getting BFPs lately. I really think my turn is coming up. I have a RL friend who told me he had a dream (or vision?) that I would be pregnant this year. Well, there are only 5 months left... After what I've already been through, that doesn't seem tooooo long... although, the sooner the better! So, here's to hope (picture me raising a glass of sparkling apple cider since I'm on metformin)!


cityprof said...

Hope is a good thing. :) I also hope this one is the cycle for you--good luck.

SaraS-P said...

Glad you're feeling hopeful. Best of luck with this cycle!

Anonymous said...

I'm glad to hear that your spirits are up this cycle. I was just saying on my blog that I have a very good feeling about this upcoming cycle (I'm on CD 2), and that I really felt it strongly, not just for myself but for all my RL and IF friends as well. SO far it has worked 3 of my IF's got PG (all had been trying greater than 1 year) and 1 RL got the final approval on an adoption she was doing. So that just tells me that my gut is right and this will be a magical month for all of us. I'll just include you in my good month circle and I just know that we will get good news this time!

Good luck!

wanttobeamom said...

Mrs. B, I am definitely on board for being included in your good month circle!!! Thank you! =)

Kim said...

Glad you're feeling hopeful. That's what keeps us going.

OPKs are good. They take the guesswork out of temps and everything else. I hope you like them.

Progesterone has made a difference for me, too. Some wacko side effects but it's made my cycles longer and that gives me hope! Maybe the doctors are getting us closer to the big 9 month wait!

Alison said...

Harry Potter? Can't get enough! :)