Well, I went to the baby shower yesterday. It went pretty well. I didn't have any hidden emotions well up, so that was good. My biggest struggle was not saying anything when they were talking about pg symptoms and planning (it's too early and I didn't want to steal the spotlight). The only tension was in the beginning with one of the preggos, but then it was ok. In fact, she volunteered to help me with a scrapbooking project for our next get together. That really surprised me.
Why the tension, you might ask? Well, at our Christmas gathering this girl talked about her pg the whole time and even told another girl who all the preggos were, excluding me of course, where I could hear. Then later she and her hubby were talking to the newly engaged girl and warned her about being careful about NFP on their honeymoon or they would end up pg... right in front of me. This girl was one of the ones who announced her pg in Sept right before I m/c'd so she knew what happened with me. I didn't say anything to her at the party, but I did go to the bathroom and cry twice. A couple weeks later I wrote her an email asking for her help. I explained to her how hard it has been for me and everything I had gone through and that it would really help me out if she would limit how much she talked about her pg in front of me. I didn't ask her to avoid the topic completely or anything. I wasn't mad at her either (although I thought she was kind of insensitive), I just wanted to avoid emotional breakdowns at future gatherings. She never emailed me back. The next news from her was that she wasn't coming to the New Years Eve party. I emailed her again that I never intended for her to avoid gatherings and that I hoped she would attend. She still didn't email me back. In the end, I didn't go to the New Years party, but for other reasons. The shower was the first time I saw her after all that.
Anyway, I hope things continue to go well with this pg so that I can be comfortable around my friends. They really are great ladies! There are just a lot of fertiles in the group. I am glad it went well. It was fun to see everyone and we made some funny onesies for the moms.
OK, I need to get ready for work... It's going to be another long week... =(
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4 comments:
Blech for insensitive preggers, but yay to you for going to a shower when your own pregnancy is still in the oh-so-tenuous stage. I have been avoiding RSVP-ing to a neighbor's shower until after the 13 week mark. . . just in case. I don't honestly think that I could go if something happened to my pregnancy. She is not a close friend, so it won't be weird if I don't go, but I would like to attend if possible.
Anyway, I know how long the days are waiting for that first ultrasound. Fingers are crossed for you. . .
GO You for standing up for yourself! AND going to the shower! I am glad that you were able to enjoy yourself. All things considered, you are an excellent friend! Hoping that long week seems shorter and shorter
GOOD FOR YOU! I'm glad that you went and got through it relatively unscathed. As for your friend, she sounds a lot like my sister. And it is really hard dealing with things like that, so I know how you feel. Hopefully the shower is a step in the right direction for the two of you! :)
Wow that's awesome. I think I missed your BFP so CONGRATULATIONS! And I'm so proud of you for making the effort to go and doing so in such a selfless way!
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